Long Live the Queen (Part One)
Long may she reign.
My Inner Queen that is.
I want to say that I am writing this post not for just my own Inner Queen, to let her out of the darkness into the light, to own it up to who I am becoming, but also for all the incredible Queens before me who inspired me, and those to come, both with me as part of my own Queen Collective inspiring one another to greater heights, and especially those magical beings who will come after me, those who haven’t yet found their own crown. Darling, your time is coming.
There are milestones in one’s life that really ought to be marked with some sense of pomp and ceremony, you know, a gravity lent to important things. This is one of those moments for me. It feels like the perfect re-entry into my beloved passion project after a while away.
For a little while there I stopped, stagnated, went backwards, felt paralysed and just went into the depths again. It had to happen exactly as it unfolded, but it was decidedly “unpretty”. However as with all universal plans, while back in the chrysalis this time, something shifted dramatically, something has radically changed. It’s as far from what I expected as I can imagine, but the Universe and Spirit are funny like that. They give you what you least anticipate, and what you most need.
And so, with this, I am happy to announce that Queen Cook is (f**king finally) in the house perched happily on the throne within.
This isn’t some happy accident, it’s not like my Queen whipped into the antechamber of my inner world one day and WHACK suddenly I think I am royalty.
All like; “Queen Cook has arrived, all step aside, and hail the Queen”.
So very much NOT that.
This is not a queendom of one. Although my version of a Queen is very much my own. The particular queendom I am a part of is actually chock full of magnificent Queens. I am very far from aloof and alone in my ivory tower. This is more like a benevolent, collaborative, far less c*nty version of Let Them All Eat Cake, where the central theme is actually #letsalleatcake #literally #rightnow #together. I’ll come back to this in Part Two.
In truth, this Queen business didn’t come easy, but is no regal surprise. This has been in the offing for some time now. In my hiatus from Miss Cook & Co, I have been forced by circumstance and hard work to step up my inner game, my own personal development starting to speed up rapidly, my willingness to embrace things I previously cowered from is markedly increased, my true self willing far more than ever to take up space in the world around me.
So, with all of that, It’s not really that big a shock that currently I am feeling the really intense and powerful rise of my inner Queen.
Before I go on to explain what this means, I need to own something first, because in being your own Queen there is an enormous piece around humility and acknowledging when you are bang out of alignment.
So here goes…previously, I judged the SHIT out of any woman or man that dared to adopt, own or embrace the term QUEEN. Oh how I judged. That, in my small mindedness, equated to being an unreserved ASSHOLE. Self important deluded AF ridiculous asshole to be specific.
So, I get it. I know for some of you this is horrendously uncomfortable and a little like watching a train wreck in slow motion. You may be feeling a little mix of pity for me that I have finally run mad with all this #woowoo bullshit (possible) and/or how sad I am wanting to jump on some sort of populist #yaassssqueen wankfest. I feel you, I have been you, and I want to say to you that you are absolutely entitled to feel this way, and also to thank you for at least making it this far. You showed up, and for now, that’s enough.
However, I wouldn’t be here writing this if I didn’t know it was essential to speak my own personal truth without worrying about what an old version of myself, or you, might have thought/think about it. So, here I am, in my truth now, saying what is real for me.
I mean, you really think Beyonce asks anyone before she struts onto stage before 50,000 screaming fans, ever, “y’all think I should really be here?”.
She just knows she is the Queen, and takes the stage because something in her tells her that is exactly where she is supposed to be and that her being here is following her calling.
It is what it is. That woman is a Queen and she sure as hell is not backing away from that fact. Neither am I. What I am not saying is that I am Beyonce #forclarity #yet, but I too am my own Queen. Slight difference in audience size, zero difference in attitude.
Honouring your inner Queen, and acting from that place of personal power and knowing, doesn’t mean you are not human, and won’t have moments of “oh fuck”. You absolutely do and will.
Conversely, it’s also not egotistical to own that Queen. It doesn’t make you a dick, it makes you authentic. If that’s what’s inside you, dammit human, own it. Particularly for us as women, we are told to turn down our shine/radiance/fullness frequently, we are reminded constantly that it’s not welcome, it’s “too much”, that this constant admonishment of our brightest and most powerful selves becomes the white noise soundtrack to our lives.
To that, I say FUCK THAT. No. Nein. Not for me.
Being a Queen is actually the simplicity of understanding you are here for a reason, and having the temerity and tenacity to step into that purpose without question. To say yes to the power within, and no to anyone would have you turn that down to make them feel more comfortable with your radiance.
It’s not about you, the little you that says “I am not good enough for this”, it’s so much more than that, it’s about your higher self. Being what you were put here to do.
FYI, this has not come easy for me in case you are wondering. This didn’t just arrive as a piece of information out of nowhere, like a post it note left on the fridge from the Universe, all “by the way from today you will be a Queen. Queen Cook. You have a great day now”.
Ummmmm no. This came with all the grace of a herd of elephants invading my small apartment.
Part Two to Long Live the Queen will walk you through the gory details of how this Queen came to sit on her throne, and how you too can learn to find, and sit proudly, on yours. Lord knows this world needs all the benevolent Queens (and Kings) it can get. There are plenty of thrones to go around. Let’s all get one.
All my queenly love to you and your inner queens.